Newsletter 09: Saying No to Negativity

Patty Onderko has collected the best negativity reduction tips from psychologists, coaches and authors to help you identify your negativity habits and to begin chipping away at them.


  1. Set reasonable goals. A lot of people who see the negative side of things also tend to put themselves down because they set huge, intimidating goals that are difficult to attain.


  1. Turn “problems” into “challenges.” Words are very powerful. Try creating a list of negative words or phrases that you use often and replace them with ones that are more positive.


  1. Reset your default answer. People who are naturally negative tend to use no as their first response to new ideas and experiences. Default instead to “I’m not sure; give me a minute,” then try to find a good reason to say yes before you say no.


  1. Display that award. It can be important to have physical reminders of positivity in one’s environment. It’s hard to get down on yourself in the face of real proof of your abilities and full life.


  1. Put your hands up! Historically, humans and other animals have expressed power through large, open postures. So, the next time you need a confidence boost strike a “power pose”.


  1. Be a critical thinker, not a critical person. If you’re a critical, analytical thinker recognize that you are likely to have the critical thought first, but practice redirecting those thoughts by asking yourself, What else is also true about this situation/dilemma/person?


  1. Wake up on the right side of the bed. Ask yourself three “morning questions”: 1) What am I excited about doing today? 2) Who can I encourage or serve today? (Get the focus off yourself.) 3) What am I grateful for?


  1. Detox from bad news. We’re not suggesting that you live in a hole or pretend that strife and tragedy don’t exist, but until you can build up some immunity to the negativity that the things like the evening news can deliver, take a break from it.


  1. Drop your distortions. Recognise what your distortions are and see whether you can view circumstances through a clearer, more helpful lens.

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